Lead at Any Level

Amy C. Waninger

Positive Feedback: 4 Simple Steps to Meaningful Reinforcement

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Have you ever been told “good job!” after you’ve finished a task or assignment? I hope you have. I’m sure you have. You probably felt good about the comment for the moment, but did you really know what you did well? Giving positive feedback or affirmation to others in the workplace (and in our personal lives) is important, but not many of us do it well.

Author’s Note: For the purposes of this article, I will use the terms positive feedback and affirmation interchangeably to mean “feedback intended to encourage an observed behavior.”

Why is it important to affirm effective behavior?

Most of us have a very vocal internal critic. We see ourselves through the lens of our own insecurities. It’s often said that we “compare our insides to everyone else’s outsides.” Getting feedback about what we’ve done well helps us gain a more balanced view of our skills, behaviors, and performance. Most important, though, is that when we know we’ve had a positive impact, and we know what we’ve done to get that result, we can choose to continue the behavior.

When should I give someone positive feedback?

Always provide feedback in private first. If you want to give public recognition of someone’s effort or impact, ask them first if they are comfortable with your doing so. In a work environment, I also recommend following up with the individual’s manager when feedback is positive.

Alright, fine. I’ll do it. How does this work?

I use a four-step format for feedback. For positive feedback, the steps are Behavior / Impact / Tomorrow / Expand (BITE). This format allows you to give clear, specific, and actionable feedback to reinforce effective behaviors.

  1. Behavior:
    Begin by specifically identifying the person’s words, actions, or behavior that had a positive impact.

    “Your preparation for the meeting today was very thorough, particularly your research on brand awareness.”

  2. Impact:
    Next, describe the impact the person’s choice(s) had.

    “Your quick answers made a strong, positive impression with our client.”

  3. Tomorrow:
    Explicitly state that they should continue this behavior “tomorrow” or in the future.

    “Next time we meet with the client, I’d like for you to duplicate that level of research and analysis.”

  4. Expand:
    If you are the individual’s coach, mentor, or manager, I suggest giving them a stretch goal in this step of the process. Be careful, though, not to create more work for the person every time they do something well. That is called punishment, and most people learn to avoid it.

    “You should share your research process during the intern training program.”

Common Pitfalls

Vague praise is not particularly helpful or actionable; hyperbole tends to embarrass the person we seek to affirm. In fact, research, research, and more research suggests that praise of someone’s identity (“You are so smart!”), rather than of their effort or behavior can actually do more harm than good.

Practice This Skill

Practicing the BITE format with a live human will help you develop this essential leadership skill. Positive feedback is almost always well received — especially if you time it right (see above) — so use this opportunity to develop yourself and delight others!

Set a daily or weekly numeric target for providing positive, BITE-style feedback. Record your successes (and missteps) and observations along the way. Once you’ve mastered this skill, move on to giving constructive feedback. Think of it as “leveling up.”

 

Diversity Champions Are Everywhere … and We Need to Be!

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Author’s note: This article is adapted from my book, Network Beyond Bias.

If you look at my resume or my LinkedIn profile, you will deduce that I am an experienced management professional with a background in Information Technology and the Insurance industry. On the surface, I may not seem a natural “diversity champion.” One need not look too deeply, though, to understand why I am on this path.

My Diversity Story, Part 1 of Many

In high school, I frequently heard that my first-in-class math scores were impressive…for a girl. When I was a Computer Science major in college, total strangers told me I should go into Nursing or Education. Because those were good fields for women. When I worked as a programmer, my bosses praised my work; my peers told me I was very analytical…for a girl. I moved into analysis and design roles based on my exceptional ability to solve problems from an end user’s point of view. I frequently heard that I had great people skills…for a programmer. When I first became a manager, some of my former peers said I was too young to lead them effectively.

But when I moved into management, I vowed that I would never qualify my feedback or pigeonhole my team members based on their demographics, their work histories, or their untried skills. My approach has always been to help each of my team members identify their strengths and contribute in ways that excite them. Along the way, I have built teams that turned into “talent factories,” mentored new managers, improved business processes, and bolstered the bottom line. I am convinced that this success was driven by valuing the diversity of my team members’ strengths, interests, and backgrounds.

Diverse Talent Gets Discouraged

Corporate culture can stifle diversity in so many ways. There is a lack of role models and mentors. Promotions and rewards are often based on “cultural fit” over performance. Managers don’t know how to cross cultural boundaries to cultivate potential. Job postings list geography requirements that candidates could easily overcome with technology and occasional travel. People fear having authentic conversations in the workplace. The diversity that could exist in many companies never gets in the front door.

I have worked primarily in two industries: technology and insurance. Both industries are struggling to find and retain talent.  Both industries lack diversity in their executive ranks. I firmly believe the latter is the cause of the former. And I want to do everything I can to turn these tides.

My Journey as a Diversity Champion Is Taking Shape

For years, I spent every bit of my discretionary effort either getting better at my “day job” or finding ways to contribute to my employer’s diversity and inclusion efforts (my passion).

Now, I am finally turning my passion into my purpose. Through Lead at Any Level, I am inspiring others to meet their potential at work, to leverage diversity as a competitive advantage for their own careers, and to build inclusive cultures from the ground up.

At first glance, I may not be an obvious diversity champion.

And that’s exactly why I need to be.

You Don’t Have to Be in the Parade to Celebrate LGBT Pride Month

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June is “LGBT Pride Month” for the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender (LGBT) community. Every June, we honor the bravery of Stonewall Inn patrons in 1969, who stood up for their rights against all odds. This act of rebellion, of not staying in the shadows, of refusing to be arrested and beaten one more time, is often cited as the beginning of the Gay Civil Rights Movement.

Learn about LGBT Pride Month

If you don’t know the history of the Stonewall Uprising, I suggest PBS’s American Experience documentary on this topic. It is a well-researched, carefully crafted, and beautifully told collection of first-hand accounts. You can stream this video for FREE on PBS.org

Being an Ally Starts with Understanding

Honor the struggles and triumphs of the LGBT community. Start by educating yourself. Then, ask how you can be an ally.

Recommended Reading: LGBT History and Memoirs